Sequel to Valentine Vows

Vin stared down at the cold steel tabletop in front of him as if it were the most fascinating thing in the world. In truth, he wasn't seeing it at all. Nor was he aware of Chris sitting to his right, casting worried glances at him, or of Josiah sitting to his left acting as his Union counsel. A spot Ezra would normally occupy. No, his thoughts were trapped in a loop, constantly replaying the events of a bust three days ago.

He watched in his mind's eye as the gunrunner they were busting aimed at Chris' unprotected chest. At such close range, that caliber weapon, there was no chance of survival. Vin pulled the trigger for a dead-center head shot that would kill the man before he could kill Chris. Everything seemed to slow down to a crawl as he watched in horror. The triggering mechanism of his rifle had only just engaged when Ezra suddenly appeared in his line of sight, his own gun aimed at the gunrunner. There was a rushing sound in his ears like wind through a tunnel. His whole world spun and shifted on its' axis as he watched the gunrunner and Ezra go down.

The loud bang of the interrogation room door slamming shut echoed through Vin's thoughts like the report of the rifle, making him jump. He would have bolted if Chris and Josiah hadn't put a hand on his shoulders to calm him. Vin glanced at the newcomer, his thoughts immediately returning to the sequence of events that led up to him accidentally killing his beloved.

Chris and Josiah however glared at the man who smirked at them from across the table. He noisily placed his briefcase on the table, seeming to enjoy the sight of Vin once more jumping nervously.

"Good morning, gentlemen. I'm Agent Halpern from Internal Affairs. I'll be handling the case. Shall we begin?"

"First of all, Agent Halpern," Chris growled, half-rising from his chair, "It is not a good morning. One of my men is dead so it is not going to be a good morning for quite a while. And if you don't show some proper respect and wipe that smirk off your face, I'll beat it off you. Understand?"

"Chris," Judge Travis' voice stopped Chris in mid-motion. He turned his head to find the older man closing the door as he entered the room. "Sit down, Chris."

Once he complied, the Judge turned his own glare on Halpern. "As for you, Agent, you will keep a civil tongue or this interview will end and someone will replace you. Do you understand?"

"You can't do that! It'll be an obstruction of justice."

"I can do that, and I am simply making sure justice is carried out. I will not allow petty small-mindedness to prevent Agent Tanner from getting a fair hearing. So I suggest you think carefully before you ask your questions."

Halpern gave the Judge a disgruntled look before opening his briefcase. He pulled out a notepad and a file folder which he flipped open. Clicking his pen to open it, he made a quick note on the pad then looked at the Judge as he gestured at the Agency tape recorder.

"May I begin?" His tone was close enough to sarcasm that the Judge glared at him but nodded for him to continue anyway. Halpern hit 'record' and cleared his throat noisily as he looked at his watch.

"It is 10:30 am on May 17th of 2002. I am Agent Halpern of Internal Affairs of the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms investigating the shooting death of Agent Ezra P. Standish by Agent Vincent Tanner, both of Team Seven, on May 14th of 2002. In the room with Agent Tanner and myself are Agents Christopher Larabee and Josiah Sanchez, acting as Agent Tanner's counsel, and Assistant Director Orrin Travis. Now, Agent Tanner, would you please describe for me the events that lead up to you shooting Agent Standish?"

Chris growled and started to get up but the Judge waved him back while glaring meaningfully at Halpern.

"Excuse me, Agent Tanner, please describe for me the events that lead to the death of Agent Standish?"

When Vin continued to stare silently at the table, Chris nudged him. "Vin."

Slowly, as if it were a great effort, Vin turned his head to look at Chris.

"You need to tell him about the Anderson bust, Vin."

"Ezra's dead," Vin said quietly.

"Yes, Vin," the Judge said gently. "We need to know what happened."

Vin's gaze returned to the table. For a moment it seemed like he wasn't going to answer. His voice was strained when he did. "We were busting Derek Anderson for gun trafficking. Chris was acting as a buyer while E-Ezra was the middle man. Anderson's a paranoid son of a bitch so they couldn't wear a wire or vests. They made the deal then Buck and the boys burst in shouting ATF and freeze. I was up in the rafters in sniper position. Things went to hell like they usually do. Anderson and his guys started firing while Chris and Ez-Ezra took cover.

"Things happened so fast I don't remember everythin'. Next thing I see is Chris unarmed, Anderson pointing a gun directly at him. There was no way Chris could've survived. Chris shifted a little to the left givin' me a clear shot. I'd just squeezed the trigger when..when..when he w-was there. I c-couldn't stop it. I jerked my rifle up hopin'...hopin' ta miss but it didn't. It didn't miss him. I killed him. I killed my Ezra."

Tears slid unheeded down Vin's cheeks. Josiah placed a hand on Vin's shoulder while Chris grasped his forearm.

"It was an accident, Vin," Josiah said, trying to comfort him.

"You said 'my Ezra,' Agent Tanner," Halpern continued. "Were you and Agent Standish engaged in a homosexual relationship?"

"That question has no relevance on this investigation," objected Josiah.

"Judge," Chris growled.

"But it does," Halpern argued. "If Agents Tanner and Standish were engaged in a personal relationship then there is possibility for a motive for murder."

"Wait just a damned minute here," Chris shouted. "Vin did not murder Ezra. It was a damned accident."

"Sit down, Chris," the Judge ordered. "No one is accusing Vin of murder. Tread carefully, Agent Halpern. Tread very carefully."

"Were you or were you not involved in a sexual relationship with Agent Standish, Agent Tanner?"

Vin fingered the bracelet on his wrist. "Me an' Ezra love...loved each other. Last thing I ever wanted to do is hurt him."

"And how long were you two involved?"

"Next month'll be a year and a half."

"I see, and when was the last time you two fought?"

"Fought?"

"Yes, fought. I find it very hard to believe that a relationship of a year and a half has never had any fights, disagreements or misunderstandings."

"We disagree," Vin answered. "We like different things, same as any couple. Only two things we ever really argued about is Maude and he thinks I'm overprotective sometimes."

"Overprotective? Or do you mean possessive? I think I understand now. Agent Standish was a handsome man, turned a few heads. Was he seeing another man on the side? Maybe a woman? That's the real reason you killed him isn't it, Agent Tanner? If you couldn't have him, no one else could?"

Vin was on his feet and had a hold of Halpern's shirt front, dragging him halfway across the table. "You son of a bitch. I ain't never had no reason to think Ezra would ever stray. We loved each other. Pledged vows to each other. I was trying to save Chris' life. Instead, I destroyed the most precious thing in my life. He loved me and I killed him." He suddenly released Halpern and sank back into his chair, covering his face with his hands.

"I killed him. I killed him," he whispered over and over. Chris and Josiah were by his side instantly. Judge Travis clicked off the recorder.

"Get your things and get out, Halpern. You are not to contact Team 7 without my presence. Your superior will be informed."

"But..."

"Out," the Judge growled, turning his back on him. Halpern gathered up his things and left in a huff.

TWO WEEKS LATER
ATF JUDICIAL HEARING

"After hearing everyone's testimony," Denver Director Wade said from his seat on the three-man panel, "We have reached a decision."

Houston Director Ruiz continued, "It is this Judicial Committee's finding that the death of Agent Standish was an accident. Agent Tanner took a shot to save a fellow agent's life and could not have foreseen what happened. While Bureau policy does not condone intimate relationships between two agents of any gender, we do not feel, as Agent Halpern has tried to suggest," he paused to glare at the man in question, "That this was some sort of crime of passion."

Ruiz gazed sympathetically at Vin, who continued to stare straight ahead dully. "We are truly sorry for your loss, Agent Tanner. Agent Standish was a good man and a talented agent, even if he did have a penchant for trouble. All charges against you are dropped and you are being placed on leave of absence until such time as you are ready to come back to work. Full psychiatric evaluation and a physical will be required before you are placed back on active duty. Do you understand what I've said, Agent Tanner?"

Vin's gaze flicked towards him briefly before he answered softly, "Yes, sir."

"Good."

"As for you, Agent Halpern," said L.A. Director Vaughn, the third man on the panel. "An official reprimand is being placed in your file. Your handling of this investigation was deplorable. Once you discovered the relationship between Agents Tanner and Standish you did everything you could to make it appear that this accident was the result of jealousy or anger on Agent Tanner's part. You completely dismissed the testimony on the actual events in your zealousness to prove this was a result of their relationship. It is your job as Internal Affairs to investigate impartially. Instead you allowed your prejudices to color everything you did. Do not let it happen again. Understand?"

"Understood, sir."

"Good," said Director Wade. "This hearing is adjourned. You are free to go, Agent Tanner. We hope that one day you will be able to put this incident behind you."

Vin nodded numbly then let Chris guide him from the room, Buck, JD, Josiah and Nathan following behind them.

A YEAR LATER

At the sound of a light knocking on the outer office door, six heads immediately looked up. Two looked away again, not knowing or caring about the older woman in the doorway. The other four men immediately sprang to their feet.

"Maude!" Josiah breathed, stepping forward to hug the, for once, unresisting woman. They were all surprised when she hugged each of them, even Nathan. Maude held JD extra long, perhaps remembering when Ezra had been his age. This was a marked difference from the last time they'd seen Maude. At Ezra's funeral she'd been cursing them, accusing them of murdering her baby boy.

Finally Josiah asked, "What brings you here, Maude?"

"After what happened we thought," Buck trailed off.

"Yes, well," Maude smiled sadly as she took the seat Josiah offered her, "my dear husband Fitz managed to talk me into going through some of Ezra's things that he'd left me. It made me face up to some truths that in my grief and anger I hadn't wanted to admit. I.... Who are those two young men trying to pretend they are not intently listening to our conversation?"

The four men turned to glare at the two newer agents. Buck answered curtly. "Ma'am, these are Agents James Saunders and Malcolm Warren. They just started with us last month. Boys, this here is Ezra's momma, Maude Standish-Har..."

"It's Fitzgerald now, Buck. I remarried just before the accident."

This caught their attention. She smiled sadly at them. "Yes, dear boys, I've come to realize it was nothing more than a horrible, tragic accident. That's why I'm here. I...I wanted to apologize to you all and to Vin for my behavior."

"Vin's not..." JD started.

"Here. I know, darlin'. They told me downstairs." Before she could say anything else Chris came out of his office.

"Ya know, ladies, I'm paying you to work, not sit around and gab all...Maude? I...I didn't know you were here."

Saunders and Warren watched as the man they'd come to consider the most stone-faced, unemotional son-of-a-bitch stopped dead in his tracks and actually looked to be on the verge of tears.

"It's all right, Chris," she said, rising to her feet and crossing to him. Taking him in her arms, she held him tightly, wondering at how thin he felt. He'd always been on the thin side, but now he was practically a scarecrow. They had all shown signs of grief and stress, a little thinner than before, eyes sadder, but Chris was the worst. Always a little on the pale side, his skin was now practically transparent. He'd lost far too much weight, looking gaunt instead of lean.

Worst of all though was the desolation and despair in his eyes. Maude knew then that they had truly grieved for her son and, though not dead yet, they mourned his mate and their friend. She held Chris tightly to her, understanding too well what this man was suffering.

Once more she felt guilty for having accused these men of willfully causing the death of her son. They had loved him just as much, if not more, then she ever had. Finally she pulled away, gently placing a hand on his stubbled cheek.

"How are you doing, Chris?"

"Truth?"

"Truth."

"I've been better, ma'am. Doesn't help much with today being...well, the day that it is."

"Yes, I imagine not. Though it is a bit apropos." Maude smiled sadly, then stepped back to look at the other four men who had called themselves Ezra's family. "Will Mr. Tanner, Vin, be back soon?"

"Um, no, ma'am," Chris answered a little uncomfortably. "After the hearing and he was cleared of the charges he resigned. Didn't even bother with going to the Agency psychologist. He's...he's staying up at the cabin on my property. It's where he and Ez...they spent some real good times there. I go up to see him a couple of times a week and bring him some groceries. He hasn't been down from there since he first went up."

"I see," Maude nodded. "I...would it be possible for me to visit him. I'd like to talk to him, but first I wanted to show you gentlemen something. If I might?"

"Of course," Josiah jumped in immediately. "What is it, Maude?"

"It's a video tape Ezra made for me just...just before he...before the accident."

"We have a VCR and TV in the conference room, ma'am," Nathan offered.

"That will do just fine, Mr. Jackson. Thank you." Maude turned to look at Saunders and Warren, who looked as if they might follow them. "If you gentlemen do not mind waiting out here? My son considered these men family and what I have to show them is personal. You do understand."

"Of course, ma'am," Saunders reassured her. "It's family business. We understand completely." They watched the small group disappear into the conference room before turning back to their desks.

JD took the tape from Maude and popped it in the VCR, turning on the TV while the others sat down at the conference table. He quickly took his seat by Buck, wondering like the others what was on the tape. There was a couple of seconds of snow then an out-of-focus image popped up. As it came into focus they could see it was Ezra wearing casual clothes, sitting on his couch and looking at something or someone off camera. Sound came on mid-sentence.

"...sure about this, Vin?" he was saying. "She's probably not even going to watch it."

"She's your mother, Ez. Of course she'll watch it," Vin answered from off-camera.

"You don't know my mother." Ezra ran a hand through his hair then glanced warily at the camera. "Is that thing recording?"

"Yep."

"Good Lord! Why? I'm not dressed properly." Ezra started to get up and walk away but suddenly Vin appeared on screen, one hand reaching out and grabbing Ezra's shirt before he could escape.

"No ya don't. You just sit down and talk to your ma. What you're wearin' is just fine." Vin pushed him down onto the couch. Walking around to the back, he wrapped his arms around Ezra and hugged him. "Just talk to her. Tell her how you feel." He pressed a kiss to the top of Ezra's head before walking off-screen. "I'll be right over here making dinner."

"But Vin..."

"No buts. Talk."

"You're evil. You know that don't you?"

"Love ya too. Now talk."

Ezra sighed. Finally, he smiled weakly at the camera. "Hello, Mother. Hopefully you've chosen to watch this tape rather than just toss it in the trash. I.... To be honest, I'm not really sure what to say." He paused again, looking down at his hands clasped in front of him then looked back up again.

"All my life you have pushed me. You've pushed me to learn how to protect myself from the world, how to hide my thoughts and emotions so I would always have that edge and to never let anyone close. Not even you. I know too that you've always had big plans for my future, marriage to one well-to-do girl or another. Those were your plans, Mother. It wasn't what I wanted." Ezra frowned for a moment. "Actually, I had planned to marry some well-to-do woman at some point, but that was before I met Vin. Either way I know I've been a disappointment to you, Mother, a failure."

"You're not a failure," Vin's voice came from off-screen.

"Vin," Ezra started, turning to look at Vin.

"No," Vin said, entering the screen and sitting down next to Ezra. "You are not a failure."

The screen paused for a brief moment then started up again. Vin was gone and Ezra now held a half-full glass of clear liquid.

"I'm sorry, Mother, that you found out about Vin and I the way you did. I am a grown man though and entitled to some privacy in my own home. The fact of the matter still remains that I love Vin, and he loves me."

"Damn straight," came from off-screen, letting them know Vin hadn't gone far.

Ezra ignored him. "I won't lie and say I've always been bisexual, because I haven't. Vin is the only man I have ever loved or wanted and, Josiah's God willing, he is the one I will spend the rest of my life with."

JD sniffed and wiped at the tears on his cheeks, not daring to look at the others. Had he done so he would have seen answering looks of grief on their faces. The video continued, ignorant of their reactions.

On screen Ezra turned in the direction Vin's voice had come from. "Would you come here, Vin?"

"Why? This is about you and your ma, Ez."

"No, it's about us." Ezra held out his hand and even in profile it was easy to see the love shining on his face. "Please?"

"Oh, alright. Never could resist you," Vin said, smiling gently as he came on screen and took Ezra's hand. Ezra tugged until Vin was sitting beside him, then turned to face the camera once more. He laced his fingers through Vin's.

"I love Vin, Mother. He is the most important person in my life. I love you also, but if you insist I choose between you, then I choose vin." Ezra paused to face Vin. "I love you, Vin. Now and for always, forsaking all others."

"I love you too, Ezra. My lover. My beloved. My mate. You are the most precious thing in my life and I'll do my best to never hurt you."

They shared a short, tender kiss before Ezra turned back to the camera. "I've made the first move, Mother. I want you in my life but not at the cost of Vin. It's up to you now to decide if you still want to be a part of our life. I love you."

He reached forward, picked up the remote and clicked.

When the tape turned to snow none of them were dry-eyed. Maude gently dabbed at her eyes with a handkerchief as the others roughly used their sleeves or the back of their hand. Finally Maude looked over at Chris. He stood with his head bowed and eyes closed, tears streaming down his face. Once more Maude showed how compassionate her only child's death had made her and pulled Chris into another tight embrace. After several moments he pulled away, wiping at his face. "Sorry about that, Maude."

"Nonsense, dear boy. You have as much right to grieve as I do, probably more. Yes, I lost my son, my baby boy, but I have come to realize that while I loved him dearly I did not know him very well, nor understand him. Only since his death have I gained a better insight into him. You men though, you lost a friend, a colleague and a brother, and I suspect from your expressions you are not far from losing another. Your grief is quite understandable, gentlemen, and I can apologize only for not realizing that sooner."

"There's no need to apologize, Maude," Josiah said, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. "You had your own grief to deal with."

"Be that as it may, I'm still sorry. If it's possible I would like to apologize to Mr. Tanner in person. There is something I'd like to give him. It belonged to Ezra."

The five men suddenly couldn't look her in the eye.

"He's... He's not...?"

"No ma'am," Nathan hurried to say. "Vin's not dead. It's just..."

"He ain't been the same since the accident," Buck filled in.

"I would hardly expect him to be, Mr. Wilmington. Did you think he would just brush it off? Chris was not the same after his family was killed, why would Vin be different?"

"It's not the same thing," Buck started trying to figure out how to explain it.

The five remained quiet, glancing nervously at each other until finally Chris spoke. "I'll take you up to see him, Maude, but I wouldn't expect too much. He's living up in an old shack on my property. It's where they first said their vows to each other. Vin...he...he ain't been quite right since...since Ezra died. He doesn't talk anymore and well, he doesn't take care of himself much. I go up there at least twice a week to make sure he eats something because I know it's the only time he does, and clean him up a bit."

Maude sighed, looking down at the handkerchief in her hands for a moment. "I," she paused to lick suddenly dry lips, "I can't say as I'm entirely surprised to hear you say that. I had a dream, at least I think it was a dream, maybe more of a vision. I fell asleep on our sofa and dreamed that I woke to find Ezra standing before me, healthy and whole. There was sadness in his eyes. A sadness so strong I wanted to weep. He didn't say a word, simply walked to the room where I had stored away all his possessions. He went straight to one box and pulled out two items, one of which was this tape. He held it out to me. When I touched it to take it, I suddenly found myself standing in a mountain meadow looking at a small cabin with a horse in the corral next to it. Then I was standing near the edge of a cliff and I saw Mr. Tanner sitting on a rock just staring out over the cliff. To say I've seen him look better would be an understatement. His eyes held the same sadness as Ezra's, and pain. I don't believe I have ever seen eyes so tortured before. I know I cannot make his pain go away, but I need him to know that I don't blame him for Ezra's death. I want to thank him for making Ezra happier than he's ever been."

Chris nodded, hoping it wasn't too late. "Do you have a set of riding clothes, Maude?"

"No, but I'll get them. Why?"

"The only way up to the cabin is on a horse."

"I see. Well, let's get going then."

CHRIS'S PROPERTY

Maude looked around her with an appreciative eye as they traveled deeper into Chris's property. While she would never want to live out here, this wild wilderness did have a unique beauty. The horses crested another small rise and she saw a small shack back against the treeline.

"Is that it, Mr. Larabee? Is that where Mr. Tanner has been living?"

"Yeah," Chris nodded. "He and Ezra spent some good times there. Vin disappeared one day with Peso, his horse, and this is where we tracked him to. He's refused to leave since then." Chris glanced over at her. "I'm not going to lie to you, Maude. The place hasn't been well-kept and Vin ain't looking much better himself. Don't be surprised by what you see."

"Thank you for the warning, Mr. Larabee. After watching that tape I have a better understanding of the depth of emotions Mr. Tanner felt for my son. I am prepared."

With another nod Chris urged his mount forward. Approaching the shack he noticed the corral gate was open. It probably meant Vin had gone for a ride but he'd check the shack anyway. He dismounted at the corral and tied the reins to the top rail. Seeing that Maude intended to come with him, he helped her dismount and tied the reins.

Moving to the front door, he rapped on it gently. "Vin? It's Chris. Can I come in?"

When there was no answer he pushed open the door and stepped inside. Maude followed right behind him, pausing just inside the doorway. Chris hadn't been kidding; the single room shack was a shambles.

It was obvious Vin had been sleeping on the floor by the fireplace. All of the bedclothes and pillows had been dragged from the bed and formed into a nest of sorts. Beside it were the remains of some half-eaten food, a cup of water and a CD walkman with some classical CDs she recognized as Ezra's favorites. A hint of something vaguely familiar was partially hidden beneath a blanket. Pulling it out, she found a picture frame she'd given Ezra several years ago. In the frame was a picture of her son and Vin, only at one point someone had taken a black marker to the glass and tried to cover Vin's face. She choked back the tears at the thought that he had most likely done it himself. The rest of the frame was grimy and smudged as if someone had held and stroked their fingers over it many times.

Without giving thought to why she did so, Maude clutched the frame to her bosom as she turned to Chris and asked, "Where would he go?"

"There's an outlook not too far from here. I've found him there a couple of times."

"Let's go." She didn't wait for his answer before heading out to the horses, the frame still clutched to her chest. Chris followed her and helped her mount up, then mounted his own horse. He led her deeper onto his property.

Topping a small rise, they could see a lone figure sitting on a boulder near the edge of the ravine. Peso grazed a short distance away. When they were closer they could see that his bridle had been removed and hung on his saddle horn.

Vin didn't turn as they approached, nor when they dismounted and tethered the horses. Only when they were a few feet away and Chris called Vin's name softly did he respond.

"Hey, cowboy," Vin said quietly as he turned. "Hello, ma'am."

Maude was a little surprised by both the serene smile and how well he looked. From what Chris had told her, she expected him to have a full beard and look horribly unkempt. Instead he had a 3 o'clock shadow and his hair was clean. His clothes were a little ragged and it was clear he'd lost weight he couldn't really afford to. Overall, he did not look like someone who'd spent the last year prostrate with grief. "Hello, Vin."

"It's good to see you again, Ma'am. You just missed Ezra. He was here a little bit ago, but he had to leave. Not sure why, but he said he couldn't be here when you and Chris showed."

Maude looked at Chris but he just shrugged. This was a new thing. "You've talked to...to Ezra?"

"Just today. I wanted to before but I couldn't. Something kept stopping me. Not today though. Today I got to talk to him."

"What did he say, honey?"

"He said you'd be coming today." Vin shifted around so he was fully facing her. "Said you had some unfinished business to take care of and he wanted me to let you know that he loved you. He forgave you for not being able to accept the choices he made in his life. He knows you wanted better for him but he was happy with what he had. And he knows you understand now."

"Oh, honey, I do understand now," Maude whispered, the tears streaming down her face as she stepped forward and hugged Vin. Pulling back, she reached into her pocket and withdrew a silver bracelet.

Vin took it from her with trembling hands. It was the bracelet he'd given Ezra on Valentine's Day, the day they'd pledged themselves to each other. His fingers traced over the Spade as the tears fell silently down his cheeks. "Thank you, Maude. This means a lot to me."

Chris glanced around the clearing. The hairs on the back of his neck were standing up. He didn't have a bad feeling, but something definitely wasn't right here. He was glad Vin seemed to have pulled out of the slump he was in, but this was too fast a turnaround.

"Did Ezra say anything else, Vin?" he asked cautiously.

Vin looked up from the bracelet and smiled. "Yeah, he did, cowboy. He said he forgives me. That he never blamed me for what happened. And," Vin paused as his smile grew broader, his happiness almost palpable in the air, "He loves me."

Hugging Maude once more, he then stepped away from her. He nodded to Chris. "I've gotta go now."

"Go? Go where?" Chris demanded suspiciously. Every instinct was screaming that something was wrong.

Vin just smiled enigmatically. "Say goodbye to the boys for me, cowboy."

Before Chris could respond Vin turned and started walking away towards the woods halfway up the slope. Chris wanted to run after him, stop him. He wanted to shout and demand Vin not do whatever it was he was about to do. He did nothing, could do nothing as if some force held him immovable. Instead he and Maude stood there and watched him walk away.

As Vin neared the woods a figure stepped out from them. Both gasped as they recognized the figure as Ezra. When Vin reached him the two men hugged, holding each other tightly for a long moment. They separated, turning towards Chris and Maude, and waved. One last look and then they turned to walk into the forest. The two men didn't disappear into the woods so much as they simply faded away.

Vin bolted upright in bed, a cold sweat covering his chest and face as he sucked in hard panting breaths. It had seemed so real. So very real that his heart constricted painfully at the thought that it might not have been just a nightmare.

The shifting of the sheets followed by the soft warmth of a body pressing against his back, an arm around his waist told him he wasn't alone. Then finally that voice he so desperately needed to hear spoke.

"Vin? Are you alright, darlin'?"

Vin pulled away from Ezra so that he could turn around to face him. One hand lifted, hesitantly reaching out to stroke Ezra's cheek, so afraid what he was seeing wasn't real.

"Vin?" Ezra questioned softly, reaching up to capture Vin's hand in his own. "What's wrong?"

"You're alive," Vin whispered so softly Ezra had to strain to hear him. "God, you're alive."

Ezra was stunned. Both by the pain and grief in the words and by the tears that were running down Vin's cheeks. "Of course I'm alive, darlin'."

He didn't get to say anymore as Vin lunged forward, sealing their lips together in a desperate kiss, bearing Ezra down to the bed. Vin held onto him tightly as if he were afraid Ezra would disappear should he let go. After a moment Vin buried his face in the curve of Ezra's neck, simply holding him as Ezra pet him and crooned soothing reassurances in his ears.

When he finally lifted his head Ezra smoothed the hair back from his face, watching him thoughtfully.

"Did you have a nightmare, Vin? What's going on?"

Vin shook his head, he didn't want to tell Ezra how he'd killed him in his dream. He couldn't tell him of the black despair he'd felt, could still feel. Instead he leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to Ezra's lips. "Make love to me, Ezra? I need to feel you warm and alive inside me. I need you to claim me, my love."

Rolling them over, Ezra placed another kiss on Vin's lips before moving lower. He nuzzled Vin's neck, licking at the hollow. Vin tightened his hold on Ezra, moving his legs further apart so he could cradle his mate more securely between them. He needed this so badly. Needed to feel the life pulsing in Ezra's veins, needed to know it had been just a horrible nightmare.

He arched up into Ezra, grinding their hips together when Ezra closed his lips around a nipple and sucked. Nimble fingers danced over his body, caressing and kneading his skin. Vin whimpered when Ezra started to pull away, his hands holding him tighter.

"Shhh. It's alright. I'm not going far, love. I'm just divesting us of our clothes."

Ezra placed a soft kiss on Vin's belly before moving to slide off his pajama pants. Vin obligingly lifted his hips, then watched with passion-dark eyes as Ezra quickly stripped off his own pants and returned to straddle him. He started to kiss his way down Vin's chest, but Vin stopped him before he could get far.

"Vin?" Ezra questioned.

"No foreplay, Ez. Please? I need to be connected with ya now. I can't wait," Vin begged for Ezra to understand. He wasn't sure if Ezra did, but the Southerner complied anyway. He moved back up Vin's body and leaned over him to retrieve the lube and a condom from the nightstand.

Vin spread his legs further apart to give Ezra better access. He couldn't help a gasping hiss of mixed pleasure and pain when Ezra's first finger entered him. Feeling Ezra hesitate, he looked up at his handsome mate.

"Don't stop. Please don't stop," he pleaded.

After another moment's hesitation Ezra continued to prepare him. Vin couldn't help thrusting his hips, trying to take those probing fingers deeper into himself. When Ezra brushed against his sweet spot it was like every 4th of July fireworks display he'd ever seen was going off behind his eyelids.

"Oh God, Ezra! Now! I need you now," he demanded, greedy hands reaching out to pull Ezra closed to him.

"Shhh. Easy, Vin. I don't want to hurt you."

"I don't care. I need you inside me, Ezra."

Ezra pulled away long enough to sheath himself in a condom, then he was back in Vin's arms guiding his cock to Vin's entrance. Vin could sense the continued hesitation in his mate as he paused, barely breaching him. He took some of the decision from Ezra, wrapping legs and arms around him and pulling him closer, impaling himself on Ezra's cock. Both men cried out at the suddenness of their joining.

All hesitation was gone from Ezra as he began thrusting deep and hard into him. Vin thrilled at the feel of Ezra taking him so hard, almost savagely. He needed this. He needed to reconnect with his mate, be claimed by him. He needed to feel Ezra alive and whole.

Soon though, the ecstasy coursing through his body like molten lava drove out all coherent thought. He simply gave himself over to the pleasure and went with it. His back arched and his fingers dug into Ezra's shoulders and back, nails leaving scratches behind.

A hand wrapping around his cock like a fiery brand had him crying out Ezra's name in a breathless wail. He was only peripherally aware of Ezra stiffening in his arms and shouting out his own release. With a shuddering sigh he dropped down into Vin's waiting arms.

Vin held Ezra tightly in the aftermath of their lovemaking, needing to keep connected to his beloved. When both their heart rates slowed down and he could feel himself beginning to drift off to sleep, he said, "Ezra?"

"Hmm?"

"I'm asking Chris for a few days off tomorrow. For both of us."

This brought Ezra back to wakefulness and he lifted his head to look at Vin. "Why? Not that I wouldn't mind a few days off with just the two of us, but this is a bit odd. Are you sure you're alright?"

"I'm fine, Ez. It's just...it's time you talked to Maude. In person."

"What?" Ezra pushed himself up into a sitting position and twisted around so he could stare at his mate in surprise. "What brought this on? What happened in your nightmare?"

"Nothing I'm ready ta talk about but, Ez, you and Maude need to heal the breach between ya. It ain't right for a mother and son ta not be talkin' ta each other."

"She rejected me, Vin," Ezra said bitterly, turning away. "It is up to her to make the first move."

Vin sat up behind him but didn't touch him. "And the longer you wait the harder it's become for either of ya ta talk ta each other. Ezra, babe, she's your mother. She's got plans and dreams for your future and you just put a big ol' monkey wrench in 'em."

"I have never conformed to Mother's ideals regarding my life. She should not be surprised."

"Up until a year and a half ago, if anyone had asked ya if you were gay can you honestly say your answer wouldn't a been a firm 'no'?"

"Well, yes, but..."

"But what, Ez? Your ma's always believed you were hetero. You always believed you were hetero. It took fallin' in love ta tell ya different. Considerin' what she walked in on ya can't expect her ta accept it right then and there." Vin scooted up closer behind Ezra so he could wrap his arms around him in a loose hug and rest his chin on Ezra's shoulder. "We'll go and just talk ta her. If it don't work out then I promise I won't ever bring it up again."

"Promise?" Ezra asked, turning to face him.

"My word as a Tanner."

"Then we shall go talk to her, but only because you wish it."

"Thanks, Ez."

"Now, about my reward for agreeing," Ezra smiled mischievously at Vin's puzzled look.

"What reward"

"This one," Ezra announced as he pounced on Vin, bearing him back down to the bed and smothering his laughter with kisses.

And Vin rewarded him quite handsomely indeed.

~Fini~